Change and Settling In.
This week’s topic for reflection is change and settling in. It seems there is a time for change and also a time for settling in. They also need to balance each other. A lot of change without settling in can lead to a chaotic disorientation. Too much settling in can lead to complacency and being lethargic.
We recently moved from our country home to the suburbs thirty minutes away. This change has been like living in a disorienting fog of exhaustion. There was no time for settling in, only a constant rush forward. With our country home now in escrow with a new buyer we can relax and settle into our new situation. This settling in feels like a combination of letting go of what was and welcoming what is. Relaxing into being okay again and making our new home ours.
Sometimes the speed or amount of change crowds out our ability to settle into the new situation. This can feel terrible. (Some people thrive on it.) When this happens just try to remember what’s most important to you and stay true to this. When possible try to be in a place of balance with openness to the change and participation with change. Do the best you can.
It’s useful to have a practice developed over time that we can return to when life becomes too much to handle. Something that allows us to return to being open, present and okay. My go to is simply, consciously and deliberately inhaling and slowly exhaling; repeating as necessary.
When I was a plumber I knew it was essential to not get ahead of myself and definitely not get ahead of the plumbing. I needed to work with the plumbing on its terms if I was to be successful. If I got in a hurry or had an expectation of any kind it would not go well. The plumbing always won when I had unrealistic expectations. The plumbing was always 100% real and I needed to get real also. Plumbing reality taught me to be open, present and honest and the need to work with the plumbing instead of against it. I practiced being balanced with change and settling in.
It is possible to settle into a changing situation. It’s more like being settled in the midst of change and the unknown. Not needing to control it to be some other way. Being able to work with the way it is if we see an opportunity for change. I find it’s important to not try to run a marathon like it’s a sprint and not expecting to have the abilities of a twenty year old in my seventies. If I am true to my changing situation and also settle into who I am, everything works much better.
Please join us for morning Zoom zazen from 7:00 to 7:30 Tuesday and Thursday, and Sunday morning Zoom zazen and discussion of the topic for reflection blog from 8:00 to 9:00 Pacific Time. Here’s the Zoom link:
Meeting ID: 811 6100 3357
Passcode: 278259
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