This weeks’ topic for reflection is who am I?
“I went up to Suzuki Roshi’s room not long before his death. He was in bed, extremely weak, his skin discolored. He bowed, and I did the same. Then he looked right at me and said, not in a loud voice but firmly, “Don’t grieve for me. Don’t worry. I know who I am.” This is from the book “Zen is right here” edited by David Chadwick. To grieve for the loss of someone is different from grieving for the person who is dying or has died. It’s as if life is everything and death is nothing. How do you see life and death? How do you see your life and death? How do you see the life and death all around us? If you were close to death would you be able to honestly say, “I know who I am.”?
As I grow older and older it seems this time of life is about getting more comfortable with letting go. Letting go of the body I knew and letting go of an agile mind. It seems I’m preparing to let go of it all. Let go of everything I have. I can honestly say ultimately I am not this body or anything I own. Death is a shift to a different way of being.
How do you see life and death? The life and death all around and yours. And those you love and have loved.
In Zen we say the source of suffering is clinging and aversion. This clinging and aversion is something we add to the situation. It seems there is an aversion to death and clinging to life. The result is a whole lot of anxiety. How has life touched you and how has death touched you?
Please join us for morning Zoom zazen from 7:00 to 7:30 Tuesday and Thursday, in person zazen at the McNail Riley House Saturday morning from 9:00 to 11:00 and Sunday morning Zoom zazen and discussion of the topic for reflection blog from 8:00 to 9:00 Pacific Time. Here’s the Zoom link:
Meeting ID: 811 6100 3357
Passcode: 278259
Gassho,
Futai
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