This week’s topic for reflection is sickness. When I’m healthy, that is my body is healthy, I tend to not be aware of my various systems and their functioning. Then when some part of me is sick or struggling I’m very aware of it. Ordinarily I will have discomforts and pains that are noticed and allowed to come and go. Sometimes this awareness becomes all consuming when I need to just lie in bed and let the sickness be in charge. It is amazing how little I know about the parts and systems of my own body and how they function. Last year when I was about have my gall bladder removed because it was literally killing me, I had to ask the surgeon where is it, how big is it and what does it do. I had no idea the liver makes bile and it’s function with the gall bladder. Lucky for me the gall bladder is not an essential organ.
There seems to be different degrees of sickness. There are minor sicknesses like a cold where normal life can continue with this inconvenience. Sickness like the flu where rest in bed is required. There is sickness requiring the medical assistance of out-patient care. Then there is being very sick where we are put in touch with our mortality. How do these various types of sickness effect you? What is your relationship to your body?
Let’s look at the sickness that leads to death. Many of us have been with someone we loved when they died. How was it to witness this loved one’s death? Was it scary? Did it seem natural? Was there love and letting go present? If it was difficult, what made it difficult? What happens when someone dies? What happens when you die? It’s said someone once asked the Buddha, “What happens when you die?” The Buddha replied, “It’s better to ask what happens when you are alive.” I hear this response as, if you know how to live you will know how to die. The particulars are less important.
Sickness is all around us. Death is all around us and a part of us. So is life. If anything is natural it is this. Does it seem natural when it is your body doing it? When is it important to go with this flow and when is it important to take action. Last year I suddenly had a severe pain and decided to go to the E. R. I needed to show up in order for the medical providers to help me. When I was recovering three separate doctors told me if I hadn’t shown up in good physical shape they would have not been able to save me. What role do we play, for good and bad in being able to live a healthy life? How are our choices limited? We are always in a dynamic transition with sickness and health, life and death. Impermanence and change allow us the opportunity and freedom to act in the moment with choice. Do you see the freedom that is possible here?
Please join us on Zoom for morning zazen from 7:00 to 7:30 Thursday, in person Zen meditation in Eugene Saturday morning at the McNail-Riley house from 8:30 to 11:00 and Sunday morning Zoom zazen and discussion from 8:00 to 9:00 Pacific Time. Here's the link:
Meeting ID: 811 6100 3357
Passcode: 278259
Gassho,
Futai
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